Icy Burn, or, Shocking Fire?
by Soulofthepast
Summary: Rei's been in a relationship with Ami for a long time, but now she finds something within Makoto. Something Ami doesn't have. Rei loves Ami, but isn't in love with her. Makoto has always been there, and likely always will be. Ami/Makoto/Rei pairing.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Hey guys, I know, I'm on an odd pairing tangent as of late. I have a new poll in my profile that asks what people would like to see more one shot's of with a few of the odder pairings I tend to like most along with a few tried and true ones. Until then, I'm going to a short story without any rhyme or reason. Just because I want, and I'd think it would be cool. Plus, I'm a song fiction addict, so we knew this was bound to happen. Also, on the way (within the next few days) is another chapter in the Prices series, so if your a fan of that, sit tight, it'll be out soon.

This chapter was done on the fly while I waited for class to start, so I know it's really short. I think I'm only going to use one song for several chapters. Each chapter will likely only use one verse. Yep. Gotta love it eh?

AmiXMakotoXRei love triangles FTW!

Song: What You Do About Me

By: M2M

_Lyrics in italics  
_Story in normal letters.

I don't own Sailor Moon.

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Chapter 1: Shocking Words.

Makoto sat there, tears like rain fell from her face as she looked on at the scene before her. What she had been told, it seemed so much easier when she hadn't had to think about it. She knew it was happening, she knew her mind and her heart wanted something more than her life would give her. Still, the confession she had just received, it wasn't something she knew how to deal with. She swallowed, her mouth dry as she tried her hardest to put the fragmented pieces together. "I'm not that kind of girl." Makoto shook her head. "I won't be that girl, the rebound. I won't play that game."

_I wish that I was her and I wish that she was me_

Makoto sighed. Ami wouldn't take this well, not at all. Then again, Makoto wasn't feeling any better knowing that it was happening. She was that girl, the one that was the cause. Her dreams were right here in front of her, but at what cost? "Why would you even tell me this?" She sighed. "We've known each other for years and now...you just...she's going to get hurt now. You're such an idiot Rei." She stood, pacing across their dorm room. "You've no idea what you're going to do, do you? You just blurted it out without any rhyme or reason, right?"

"I don't know." Rei sighed. It was just one big mess. "I just don't want anyone getting hurt. Ami's so...innocent, so soft. This is going to kill her on the inside."  
"Yeah, no shit!" Makoto fired back. She was angry for Ami, angry because Ami hadn't known yet. "You better go talk to her. Now."  
"She and I haven't been doing well lately anyway though. I think she'll understand." Rei ran her hands through her raven hair. "She won't like it, but she'll understand."

_You gotta let her go, and I know that you agree_

"Yeah, but she's my best friend." Makoto stopped her pacing, her hands clenched at her sides. "And I'm going to hurt her just by existing." She bit her lip. "I can't believe this. This is why I hate romance. I know love isn't easy, but this is just down right wrong on so many levels."

Rei knew that part was true. Still, she had other reasons for talking to Makoto first. "Well, Minako told me to talk to you. I know she's a bit flighty, but she is the goddess of love. I thought she had a reason to send me here." The look of remorse was clear in Rei eyes. "I didn't mean for things to happen this way. It's just, university changed us both. I know no one finds their true love the first time, but I thought Ami and I would last. But, then we started to slowly drift apart. You know how that gets."

Makoto sighed, walking over to the small kitchenette when the pot of water started to boil. She threw in a few packets of tea as she took the water off the hotplate. It wasn't going to be ideal, but at the moment she could have cared less. Her mind ran a marathon. She understood what it was like being the girl not good enough. She hated being that girl, but she would have rather be that girl again than be the one to blame. Rei felt badly, Makoto knew it, but everyone who knew Rei and Ami, anyone of grand importance anyway, knew that it was rocky at the start. The reasons for the relationship had been out of baser needs, fear, and being alone. Everyone knew that it hadn't been forged out of love. Still, it didn't sit well with Makoto.

"You're right." Makoto nodded, her eyes just as regretful. "I do know how that gets. It's happened to me over and over again. I know exactly how it is." Her mind trailed back a few weeks. "but, even so, you and Ami, you've been together for a long time. She trusts me, and you." She and Rei had been sharing a dorm room for quite a while, but she couldn't think of any way she could have seduced her friend. "How long..." Rei's eyes shot to the floor. "How long have you felt this way?" Makoto pushed again.

"Last year." Rei answered softly. "After the road trip."  
"You mean the one when we all got wasted?" Makoto paled. Some things happened back then that no one wanted to remember.  
"That would be the one." The look in Rei's eyes told it all. That road trip sealed fate in more ways than one. "I've tried being faithful since then, but I just can't deny it anymore."  
"Shit." Makoto collapsed on the sofa, her breathing heavy. "Rei, you can't keep hiding it. You've got to tell her. Sooner rather than later being a damn good idea."  
"I know, but she should know already." Rei sighed. Makoto knew that part already. "It wasn't like anyone hid anything that night."  
"Right, but we were all stupid that night." Makoto thought back. They had all gotten a little too wild. "Plus, Ami was right there, so she saw everything that happened."

_'Cause how could this ever start?_

"Saw everything?" Rei rolled her eyes. "Makoto, Ami's the one who started it in the first place." Rei let out a very carefully placed sigh. It had been something she and Ami kept among themselves. It was also something Rei couldn't keep quiet about any more. "I would have always remained faithful to Ami, you know that. She would have known even if she hadn't been involved. I would have told her." Rei leaned forward in her chair then. She wasn't sure what to say, or how to say it easily. "We were drunk, so yeah, we weren't in the right of mind. Still, even if I made the first move on you, it was Ami who had put the idea in my head in the first place."

Makoto listened carefully, almost incredulously. She couldn't seem to grasp Rei's words as she continued. "Ami once told me that she had a crush on you back in middle school. It wasn't that it didn't last, it was just that she thought you were hung up on guys. Anyway, she was hurting about it back in high school, so yeah, we started something, but even now I can't really describe what that one thing is. It isn't love...not true love, but I wouldn't ever hurt her either. I do need her in my life believe it or not. But, at the end of the high school year, you know, when we decided we would have to try living together for a month to see if we could share a dorm together without killing each other? That's when it started."

"Yes, I figured that part out. But how did that escalate into this?" Makoto still hadn't been clear on that.  
"I saw a new side of you, that's all." Rei wasn't sure how to describe it. "I saw the side that I think Ami used to see, living with you made it clear."  
"Alright. I could see that." Yet that still didn't answer one question. "Then the camping trip, that wasn't just a moment if brief insanity?"  
"Ami only called it that because she hadn't been in her right mind." Rei shook her head. "The truth is, those feelings came out when she was drunk, and I guess you could say, I wasn't put off by it."

"And you followed her wishes by acting in ways she couldn't." Rei nodded as Makoto tried to understand. "Rei, I thought it was only going to be a one time thing. Don't get me wrong, I liked it, I really did. It was one of the most amazing times I'd ever had. The sex was great, but it felt nice just to wake up and know you guys were there. You have no idea what it's like waking up alone after something like that. When I woke up, and you two were there, I felt loved for one of the first times in my life, simply because you hadn't left in the morning. You guys are the people I fight alongside, you are family for me in ways I can't begin to tell you." Makoto poured the tea into mugs. "But, it's because you're all like family that I can't hurt Ami like that."

_If you're afraid to break her heart?_

Rei took the offered mug, grabbing some creamer out of her nightstand. Dorm rooms weren't exactly large. "I understand. If you would have rejected my advances, Ami would have understood too, and I would have backed off, but you didn't. I know a large part of that was what ever Minako spiked the soda with. Ami hoped that another part deep down would be because you cared about her. Still, she was happy to move on after that night. She and I, we were alright for a while, but the more I live with you, the more I see, the more I want to be apart of that life, and not just as a friend. I know it isn't easy, and I don't want to hurt her any more than you do, but I can't lead her on either. Still, what happens if I break up with her? Where will that leave her?" Her eyes searched for an answer, and somehow she knew she wasn't going to like it.

Makoto shrugged as she swallowed her own tea. "Ami will just need to deal with it." It sounded harsh, but both of them knew it wasn't meant to be. "People get hurt Rei, simple as that. Mamoru hurt you once too when you guys were dating. He was meant for Usagi. I've gotten hurt time and time again, yet I think we're all like a big gigantic puzzle piece. Somehow, we all fit together. It's just a matter of working things out. You and I may not be right for each other either. You still have Minako to consider. She's still single, and so is Hotaru." Then, as if something very important shot back into her memory like a firecracker Makoto coughed. "No, not Hotaru. Too young."

"I was wondering if you'd catch that." Rei laughed lightly for a second before getting somber again. "But still, Minako's not looking for someone in her life, I think she likes being wild and free for now, but I, I need that someone in my life. Ami's always been there, but, so have you in different ways. This Senshi thing is just impossible. Makoto, I can't break Ami like that, but I can't go on ignoring this...what ever this is. Do you know how hard it is not to crawl in bed by your side on the cold nights? How difficult it is to restrain myself each and every time someone asks you out on a date, only to stand you up? How damn much I want to kiss away the look in you're eyes right now? Do you have any idea?"

_You say you love me so_

"It isn't only lust either." Rei admitted softly. "I thought about it. After that night, I put you in my brain while showering one night, trying to see if I was just, lonely in the physical sense, but the truth is that it hadn't been the problem. I felt guilty doing it, but, I realized, that if it would have been loneliness, I would want to push you into bed after you walk out of the bathroom half naked, if I really wanted only sex, there would be so many opportunities. There's something about you Makoto, something Ami doesn't have. I can't explain it. It's just there." The light blush on her face told no lies. "Ami and I have a great life in that sense of things, we never have had issues with it. What i find in you...that's something else entirely."

"Then, if that's how you feel you need to tell her that Rei. I've never seen you act so cowardly in my entire life. You're more of a spitfire than that. Hell, you and Ami have had blowouts before, and let me say, impressive though they may be, this isn't something a shouting mach can fix. Hiding it won't help either. Just talk to her Rei. She deserves that much." With her mug now empty, she looked at the bottom the the white colored glass. It was still warm to the touch, the weight still noticeable even without liquid in it. "You can't declare things the way you have without letting her know something first. Tell her what you want, do it however you see fit, but don't you dare start something with anyone else until Ami knows how you feel."

_You have to let her know_

"Right now, I'm still trying to figure things out. I just don't know one way or the other. A kiss isn't going to answer things, I'm not some stupid fairy princess...but even so, Makoto I though you deserved to know. You know, just in case you didn't want me around here anymore. I can always room with Minako in the other building, or go crash with Usagi and Naru if I didn't have any other choice." Rei's honesty earned her a small chuckle. Makoto's amusement peeking out from her stressed gaze.

"I'm not going to kick you out idiot. I'm just not sure what to think about all of this." Then with a blush of her own, she remembered just how many times she had walked around freely without a bra on, or how she had forgotten something in the bathroom. They never locked the door, and often they saw more of each other than they would care to talk about. "It isn't everyday a friends tells you...something like this." Then with a final sigh she shook her head. "Just figure it out quickly Rei. That's all I ask. Talk to Ami too. She deserves and answer before I do."

"I will." Rei agreed. "I will."

TBC-

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Like I said, it'll be a short story. You'll likely see part 2 sometime either later tonight, or tomorrow. Please leave a review.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Sorry this is late, pretending that I didn't have a power outage, and that this chapter didn't get deleted twice, and that we are done with snow for at least a little while I think it's safe to type this up (yet again)...Stupid snow... I was the one who had to plow it too. Nothing but a hassle I tell you. It was constant brown outs. Ever typed a fan fiction in you're garage while snow keeps pelting you sideways purely so you could use a generator? It's quite interesting to try actually. (I refused to let a brown out make my laptop loose this chapter again) Anyway, here's the next chapter, even if it is majorly belated. Please read and review.

I don't own Sailor Moon.

Same song as chapter 1, only a different verse. Hopefully, you know the drill.

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Chapter 2: Icy Eyes.

Rei walked along the city streets lost in thought. She was meeting Ami at the local park, the normal meeting spot for them on Friday mornings. Rei's classes didn't start until afternoon, and Ami had the day off completely. Looking back, life had once been so simple. They were all each other needed. On the cold nights Ami often stayed at the shrine Rei grew up in. Hand in hand, they'd walk to and from school. In battle they became a stronger duo almost instantly, Rei's protective action forcing her to become a far more aggressive fighter up front. Ami stayed back, giving their princess more cover than she had ever hand before. Makoto was always the equivalent to a human wreaking ball when provoked, but part Rei had also started to learn not to pull her punches.

Rei had become far stronger, but her ruthlessness in battle wasn't only out of serving her princess. Now it also revolved around protecting the woman she loved. Not that she didn't love all of her fellow Senshi, but she needed Ami. Back then that was the only truth Rei knew. They were either going to die in battle together, or come out victorious. It seemed wrong to think of it like that, and even Luna had a few things to say about it, still Usagi supported Rei's choices in battle, even when Ami didn't. Normally, if they ever got into a shouting match, it was Rei's conduct as a warrior, hardly ever as a lover. Rei laughed at that. Ami could be a worse spitfire than anyone really knew.

_All that she wants is you_

Still the park bench told a different tale. Her nose was always in a book it seemed. Although many seemed to think it was only for studying, Rei had learned that it was also recreational. Ami's mother had raised her not to want for anything, however along with that came a strict sense of measured discipline and respect for the finer things in life. Ami wasn't ever spoiled, however she was already well off. Her mother made more than enough money that any comfort would be within reach. Ami, while not necessarily a prude, hadn't ever had to worry about where she would end up in her life. Even if she didn't aspire to hold down a high paying job, her inheritance alone would offer her stable living. Never spending carelessly, and always understanding that not all would be as fortunate as she, Ami had learned early on to be thankful for the life she had been given.

With a soft gentle smile, one that didn't call attention to herself, she turned the page. Those eyes of crystallized frost sparkled on any given day. When she was contented, those eyes shimmered beautifully. When she was angry, that gaze froze you in place, afraid to move, and often unable to speak. Still, those very same eyes could cloud over in misty lust, and even call the rain in her sadness. She was a smaller girl than most, her thin frame almost breakable...almost, but not quite. She was the epitome of a little woman, one seen as presentable for any man, elegant enough for a showroom. That was what her mother raised her to be. Manners normally came before all else when she was in a social setting, her logic overtaking her emotions.

That's why when Ami did let her hair down, it was a magical thing. "Rei, what are you doing over there?" The question was posed even if her eyes didn't leave her paperback book. Instead her invitation came in the form of her call. Quiet and yet intrigued. "Something catch your eye?" She closed her book without a sound, her features relaxed and calm. She was awaiting Rei's answer. Yeah...she was good looking, Rei could see that simply by looking. The girl had on a pair of khaki pants and light blue shirt. Form fitting, but not tight by any means. She was wearing black tennis shoes with a hot blue stripe. Casual? Yes, but not overly so. Attractive? Yes, purely because of how simple it was. Anyone could look nice in a dress, but to look nice without trying was a gift... but the real question was; Did it catch Rei's eye?

"One could say that." Rei was being careful. "You always look good though Ami, you know that." She didn't want to break Ami's heart. What was she to do? She hadn't clue.  
"Do I now?" Her tone was teasing, but part of her still didn't believe all the compliments she would receive from her friends, or from Rei.  
"If you have to ask, you'll never know." Rei laughed lightly at the indignant look that earned her.  
"There are only stupid people, and stupid ideas, but not stupid questions." Ami chided, only making Rei laugh harder. "Hey!"

_All that she sees is you _

"Sorry, sorry." Rei was trying to collect herself. She was honestly happy with Ami. Yet, part of it just didn't feel right. They were great together as Senshi, and the sex was great, but...something was missing. Both of them had agreed to that a long time ago. Rei calmed down her laughter as she thought seriously about that. "Let's go for a walk today. I'd like to talk to you about something." Ami's eyes grew steady, carefully measuring those words. "It isn't anything bad...yet. I just want to talk to you."

"With the way you added the 'yet' in your sentence, I'd highly doubt that it's only a conversation." Ami stood, walking hand in hand with Rei through the park. It was wonderful this time of year. The leaves made a mess on the ground, the sun was still warm, but not hot anymore. The breeze wafted freely, often taking the flora with it. "You and Makoto aren't about to fail another class are you?" That had happened last year after all. "If so, I think you should reduce the amount of classes you guys take in a year. Two easier classes, along with two harder ones would help the load you've taken I think."

"It isn't our classes." Rei again smirked, somewhat thinking ruefully to the poor grade she was currently trying to salvage for her business management class. "Good guess though." Her pace slowed down a little bit, her eyes looking to the ground. So many cracks and crevasses for ants to fall into. So many places a person could trip. Life was a lot like the pathway in the park. Always unclear until that next step. The grass wasn't smooth, it had bumps and bends. Again, so much like any uphill battle or downward high. Momentary at best, at worst not even noticeable. "I wanted to talk to you about us...and the future we are going to achieve one day."

Ami sighed. She knew the weight of those words. For any outsider, those words had a very basic meaning, for them it was a double edged sword. "The future isn't going to happen yet, at least, as far as I know." Ami thought about it a lot too. "Actually, even if we don't exactly have an answer for when it will happen, I'm more worried about how it will happen. The future isn't set in stone, as Setsuna always says, but if that's true, then I'm more afraid of what we may face." She could feel Rei's hand becoming tighter, only slightly. "However, I think you had a different direction you wanted to go with this. What is it?"

"Do you love me?" Rei's question was loaded.  
"Yes. I love you, as I hope you love me." Ami nodded without a second thought.  
"Is it fate though. Is it love like Usagi has for Mamoru?" Rei's question went deeper than mere love.  
"No, at least not yet." Then, as if not thinking, she blurted out more of an answer. "But I thought we would wait and see if it changed."  
"What if it doesn't?" Rei had often wondered that.  
"Then I don't know what we'll do." Ami had too.

_All that you gotta do_

"We'll have to move on in the future." Then Rei sighed. "But, what if you're right. We don't know what we may face. Luna said the future would be dependent on Usagi's marriage with Mamoru." Rei sighed, this one thing had been on her mind for a while. There wasn't any good way to say it. "Setsuna says the future will be bright. I was thinking, that if the future is based on fated love, than if we aren't in love like that, than we might not be meant to be together." It hurt Rei to say it, and she knew it hurt Ami to hear it. "There are other Sailor Senshi, and best friends might I add, that we happen to be over looking. Minako and Makoto already decided that they wouldn't ever want to be with each other, so..."

_Is to set her free_

"We might not be fated after all." Ami finished the thought. "In fact, the probability that we aren't fated rises every year. I've noticed that as we get older we drift apart from the old ways we knew, but then again, we hadn't based this of love. It grew into love, but it hadn't started as that." Ami's logic ran her feelings on the situation, but both of them knew that inside she wanted to deny any claim Rei had. They never believed in fate, not fully. Not like Setsuna who gambled her very breath on that fact alone. "And, if we aren't fated, and assuming that we need to base our future purely upon that possible reality..." Ami trailed off. Even if they had spoken on those facts before, it still wasn't easy.

"You see my point then." Rei sighed as Ami leaned into her side.  
"I always have. I've thought about this particular issue many times." Even through the assent, Ami held on tightly.  
"What do you think would happen if fate is they key." For Rei it was a statement, yet, Ami found it to be a question.  
"You would likely end up with Minako, and I would likely end up with Makoto." Filled with lament, uncertainty clouded Ami's words.

_That's what _

"I don't think I could ever date Minako purely because she is my best friend." Rei sighed. "I mean, don't get me wrong, I've thought about it, just like you used to think about Makoto. I just never wanted to pursue it any further than that night." Rei paused, licking her lips. She could still remember the taste of the booze. That night had been hazy, but even so, she remembered enough of it to last her lifetime. "Minako...she really is a free spirit. I don't think I could cope well with that. Besides, I thought we agreed to not let fate dictate our lives. Still, even if that was what we agreed on, we shouldn't keep this up."

_That's what _

"Then what do you want to do?" Ami's anger peeked through her soft voice. "Just let go of everything, purely on a whim?" Those eyes that could often hold such an odd warmth filled with something somewhat rare. "We are warriors for the future, servants for Usagi first, I know that. Aside from that, I wouldn't wish a life of pure servitude on anyone. Not even for someone as wonderful as Usagi. We are living breathing creatures Rei. Human beings with thoughts and feelings all our own. Isn't that what we decided to live for? For what we want too? For how we feel as well?"

_What you do about me_

"That's why." Rei pressed forward. "It's because of my thoughts that I want to break up. It's because of my human feelings that I don't know if we should. I've seen it Ami. I've now gotten the chance to see what you saw. I don't know if it could be fate or not. But...part of me feels like as much as I need you, I want more. I'm a greedy person, I'll admit that. You should admit that too...We deserve better than only a hope, and a randomly placed dream without rhyme or reason. We know it will happen, but anything beyond that remains unanswered. I can't keep lying to myself."

Ami broke away, as if she had been slapped. Her eyes lost in confusion. "So, you really want this to be the end then?" her disbelief clearly written all over her features.

"Right now, I can't say I know." Rei laughed bitterly, wanting to jump off the nearest bridge for her indecisiveness. "But, I can say this. We deserve a chance to be happy. Right now, I'd like to think of things as keeping our minds, and our hearts open for anything. You and I didn't sleep together out of love, I didn't take you in my room that first time out of passion. We we were afraid, we were still hurting. You still blamed yourself for what you knew was suicide back then. It was our lives as the Senshi we were that left deeper wounds than Usagi could heal, so we fixed them ourselves the best way we knew how. It may not have been right Ami, but it was all we knew how to do at the time. I just, I need time to decide if back then was really what should have happened. You...you should do the same."

"Is this because if fate?" Ami felt like it was. Even though she was angry, she could see the fear in Rei. The feeling of loss within those lavender eyes. Part of her would regret this, but an even larger part would have always wondered. Rei was like that a lot, always a mystical being in that way.

"Apart of it is." Allowing her voice to shake, Rei spoke more volumes than words. "But...an even larger part...that's different." Rei pulled out a lighter, flicking it as that small flame burned before the wind blew it out. She tossed it to Ami, watching the shorter girl catch it. "We aren't fate. We won't ever be fate Ami. If I've got to grow up into a woman that's going to kiss the ass of a future queen until the day I die, I think I deserve an opportunity to find out what fate is. I used to think I could write my own life story, but now? Now I think that even if fate doesn't control everything, it has me by the shirt collar."

She turned then, walking away, leaving Ami in stunned shock and awe. The smaller girl hadn't had time to fully register what Rei had said, but even if her ears couldn't completely hear it, her eyes saw the note tapped onto the side of the metal lighter. -finding fate- That was Rei's new mission. Not only as Sailor Mars, but as Hino Rei. Ami shook her head, holding back her tears. There came a time everyone had to choose between different paths, Ami herself had already faced many roads like that. This was merely another one.

As Sailor Mercury she had made choices Ami Mizuno wouldn't ever make. Still, Ami could remember a time, when she had only been fourteen, that she allowed a choice. It may have been fate back then, but it was still the fact she was the one who took that path. She had resented herself later, almost about to commit that same crime, if only so that she wouldn't be forced to continued on her intended destiny. Rei had saved her then, as a human with warmth. Yes, they were Sailor Senshi before all else...

No, it was because they were Senshi, that this time, all else had to come first.

TBC~

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Sorry on the long wait. Insanity at it's finest, I know. Hopefully the snow and wind will go aggravate someone else for a while so that I can use my internet in peace.


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